Been There

For our mid-summer get-away, The Captain and I took a meandering road trip to visit friends in Maine. Along the way, we added New Hampshire, and the always elusive Vermont to the list of states we’ve visited. Why is Vermont hard to get? Unlike NH, there are no interstate highways running through it that connect major city pairs, and there aren’t a lot of nearby travel destinations . While there isn’t anything wrong with that, and the locals probably like it that way, most folks don’t accidentally find themselves in a field of Red Clover (the official flower). To get to Vermont, you have to want to go to Vermont.

On our traverse of the 2nd least populated state, we spent a night in the ski resort town of Killington. Located in the mountainous center of the state, it’s several hours driving from the interstate or any significant population center. The big draw of the area is the network of 4000 foot elevation ski trails. The two lane blacktop road through town is dotted with country stores, seasonal restaurants, and ski outfitters. Since our visit was as far from winter as possible, most businesses were closed and not much was going on. Some of the hotels were doing renovations and the only action on the slopes were occasional mountain bikers bombing down the ski trails. Despite the inactivity, we made the most of it, taking in the beautiful mountain scenery. After dinner at Casey’s Caboose, one of the few operating establishments, we spent the night in an unoccupied ski lodge. Driving down the mountain the next morning, we felt certain we could put a check next to the Green Mountain State.

With Just MT, ND, SD, and NE needed to complete the 50 state quest, it brings up a serious conundrum. What’s the criteria for “Been there?” I’ve been kicking this question around for a long time. Years even. When I get the chance to pick the brain of a well-traveled person, I ask them for a definition, standard or benchmark. What does it take to know you’ve “been there?”

First the Negative test. There are some obvious ways to be physically present, but not have actually been there. The big one that comes to mind is the local airport. If you change planes at JFK, but never leave the security area, have you really been to the Big Apple? I don’t think so, and most of the folks I’ve queried agree with that assessment. Similarly, if you drive across a territory on the interstate, without ever getting out of the car, it doesn’t seem like you’ve been there either. There are lots of other examples like this, but it still doesn’t tell the traveler what they need in order to “tick the box.”

One of my brothers, #5 son, as dad called him, has a very scientific “CSI” solution. You’ve been somewhere when you can “prove” your physical presence. Specifically, if some of your molecular material or DNA is detectable at that location, and if some of the molecular material from the place is detectable on you, you’ve been there. He described it this way. Your body is always shedding skin and other cellular material. If a microscope, mass spectrometer or other scientific machinery can detect your cast-offs within the soil, water, or air, you’ve half way there. On the other side of the requirement, if a sample can be taken from your skin, bodily fluids, and so on, and a tracable amount of molecules specific to that location can be identified in the sample, it confirms that you’ve “been there.” Minimally speaking, with that standard, all you need to do is rub your hands in some local dirt. Done. But to the typical traveler, that kind of doesn’t feel like enough.

On the other end of the spectrum, Jeff, a former coworker of mine, God rest his soul, had a more involved answer. To meet his requirement, a traveler needed to share a meal in a local’s home. If that wasn’t possible, the traveler needed to participate in a local cultural event or tradition. For all the years I flew with Jeff, we never got invited to a local’s home, and he was never inclined to do stuff like run with the bulls, or walk in a Mardi Gras parade. I get what he meant about experiencing the local ways, but it’s kind of impractical.

For the task specific folks, they usually mention something like, “If you haven’t done X at location Y, you haven’t been there.” Stuff like wrangling rattlesnakes, playing chicken with a 747, or bungee jumping. I’ve never thought much of those answers, except maybe driving a car. I say that because driving in a strange place can be quite a challenge, thrilling or down right dangerous. So, while it makes sense, not every place has cars and roads, or the opportunity to drive them. Of the 25 countries I’ve visited, I’ve only driven in 8, so as the author of this blog, that answer is out.

So far, the most sensible answer to my question came at our destination in Maine. I asked our pals what they thought about it. Dave is well traveled, but Kristina has seen more parts of the world and speaks more languages than anybody else I know. Her answer? “If you’ve had a beer there, you’ve been there.” (Outside the airport, of course.) It seems like a simple answer, but there is actually a lot of parts to it. Having a beer means you’ve stopped long enough to participate in the social activity of getting a beer, such as interacting with a bar tender. You’ve also minimally participated in the local economy, legal system and tax structure. (Sounds kinda like a mini version of Jeff’s answer.) Building on that a little more, you’ve internalized a local product, meeting one of my brother’s requirements. Then, after consuming the beer, you’ll probably need to pump the bilges, which will leave evidence of your passage and thereby meeting the other part of his requirement.

Now the obvious flaw- what if there’s no beer there? Well, world traveler, if you’re adventurous enough to go somewhere where there’s no beer, you better have brought some with you, or find a substitute. Usually tea or coffee, or you can go on the hunt for a Diet Coke or Coke Light, but that’s a whole other story.